The day usually starts off with me lying in a warm bubbling Jacuzzi. Beautiful women wearing practically nothing surround me as the illustrious tunes of Dusty Roze and The Appliance Shop Crew play in the background at a low volume.

The beautiful women in bikinis feed me grapes and shrimp.

"Yeah, baby" I usually say, "Let me get another grape."

"Here you go, baby. Do you want some more shrimps?"

"It's shrimp" I correct her "Shrimp singular, baby."

Then the phone rings and I wake up.

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